Yes, It's Hard Dealing with All the Stress Going on Right Now
Feeling overwhelmed with all the news lately? Experiencing high anxiety and not sure how to handle it? For people in eating disorder recovery in San Diego and elsewhere, it can be especially triggering. In this post, I share some of what I’ve been feeling with all the fear and negativity in the news and how I’ve been coping with it.
Here’s what I journaled the other morning: “I’ve been struggling today trying to figure out what to write. There’s so much in the San Diego news and national news that is freaking everyone (and yes, sometimes me) out. From coronavirus to the election to all the negativity—it just goes on and on and on. On top of that, the past few weeks I’ve received some negative feedback about my eating disorder blogs, which has been tough to read. Whether it’s my personal life or in the news in general, it seems like there’s a wave of fear crashing over the nation right now.”
I think that to fear and panic is human. It’s hard-wired into our systems to help us survive. Whether you call it the “reptilian brain” or the “flight/fight/freeze/faint” response, it’s something that all of us have. When we sense danger, our bodies are flooded with stress hormones cortisol and norepinephrine, and we feel compelled either to fight against it or curl up in the fetal position and hope it just goes away.
The question is, how much of this danger is real, and how much of it is manufactured? I think it helps to learn how to think critically about the news we receive and how the sources influence the information that is out there. There are three sources that we get our information about national crises (a) news media, (b) social media, (c) other people.
News Media:
In graduate school, I used to be a news junkie. Since that time, I’ve cut down on it considerably because it was stressing me out so much. When I’d read or hear news stories, I felt bombarded with fear that would trigger the fight/flight/freeze/faint response, but there was nothing I could do about it. Some people say knowledge is power, but for me, there’s a point at which we have to ask, “how much power is all this news really giving us?”
It’s not that I’m against the news. I’m a HUGE advocate of the free press. In the mid-1990s, I lived a year in Russia and saw firsthand what decades of state-controlled media could do a nation. It is systematically oppressive.
I also recognize that the organizations behind news media have alternate agendas—they want you to consume more and more of their information. More viewing of their news programs means more advertising consumption, which helps their budget. Likewise on the internet—more engagement means more revenue.
With the election and coronavirus, I have found myself turning on the news more than usual. The effects have been noticeable. I feel worried when I have a tickle in my throat. I think about friends in South Korea. I’m concerned about my aging parents. I ask loved ones who are traveling whether they are going to Italy or Asia. I’ve felt more panicked and afraid.
Higher consumption of news makes me think about coronavirus more, so I feel preoccupied and drained. When I’m out in public and someone is coughing, I feel scared.
I can see directly how watching more news increases my fear, which affects my face-to-face social engagement. It’s also emotionally draining, which could affect my performance as a therapist and my interaction with family and friends.
What to Do About It?
Is there a solution for facing all of this stress in the news right now? I think so. I think the key is how we MANAGE it. It’s about being intentional in our intake of the information and how we interpret it.
Before I use news media, I have to ask, “what information I would like to get?” I posed this question the other day, and I realized that I needed to know (a) what are the symptoms of coronavirus, (b) what to do about them, and (c) what are my risks. That’s it. It wasn’t helpful for me to learn how many deaths there are in the U.S., Italy, China, etc.. That doesn’t help me—it just triggers my flight/fight/fear/faint response.
Social Media:
I was late to the social media party. I didn’t join Facebook until 2017, and Instagram until 2018.
I am a highly sensitive person, which means I feel overwhelmed when I’m around big groups of people of a long time. In a similar way, I find looking at too many social posts overwhelming.
Being a highly sensitive person means that, if I were a bug, I’d have 100 antennae taking in all the information around me instead of the typical two antennae that most people have. It makes me an amazing therapist, as I can pick up on nuances that many people can’t. I’m extremely compassionate, intuitive, and empathetic.
The flip side is that I can also be easily overwhelmed when I turn on social media because all of my senses feel assaulted with messages and emotions. It’s incredibly draining.
Whether you’re a highly sensitive person, It’s really, really hard dealing with all the stress going on right now. I see my clients struggling with eating disorders who are also worrying about coronavirus, and I feel sad for them. I think, “Aren’t their lives stressful enough? Dealing with eating disorders is one of the hardest things someone can do. And they have to fear global pandemic on top of it? Sheesh” It completely sucks.
What to Do About It?
I had ramped up my social media use earlier this year in an effort to get my message out to more people. Although I did get more engagement, it took a toll on me. I felt more drained and I ended up needing more sleep than usual.
Add information about coronavirus and elections in social media on top of that, and it felt like too much. In order to cut down the input, I had to reduce my engagement. I’ve probably reduced my social media use about 75%, and I can see a huge decrease in my anxiety.
Other People:
Receiving information from other people can be a blessing and a curse. The positive is that, for the most part, you’re interacting with people who care about your well being, so the information you get from them is likely framed from a place of care. The thing to remember is that people have their own filters of how they interpret the news.
You don’t know how these other people slept last night or whether they had a fight with their kid/spouse/coworker this morning. They could be stressed about a million other things that could affect the information they are giving you.
What can we do about it? Consider the source and the context before taking the information at face value. Appreciate their care and concern for you, and consider critically about the lens through which they are interpreting the news.
What To Do About It:
When other people express their concerns about coronavirus and the elections to me, I take a deep breath and remind myself (a) I can respond with empathy and kindness, and (b) their fears don’t have to be my fears.
Above all, we have lots of stressors going on in our lives that we need to deal with today. Worrying about a virus that may or may not affect me and my family doesn’t help us. it is scary, yes. So I acknowledge that I feel scared, give myself a hug (or ask for a hug!), and then focus on what I can do about my more immediate stressors.
When it comes to negative feedback from my eating disorder blogs, it means me working through my emotions about it, talking it through with my family and friends, and then deciding whether and how much I use the feedback to make changes to my blog.
For people struggling with eating disorders, it may mean focusing on the next meal or the next snack. It may mean reaching out to a friend when you’re struggling, or making a call to that eating disorder therapist and dietitian when you need help. Focus on the now, and then take the next step when you need to do so.
Caveat:
I’m describing what has been helpful for me, which may not fit for you. The important thing is first to recognize what is increasing your anxiety and triggering your fight/flight/fear/faint response and then reduce those triggers. It’ll help reduce your stress levels and free up your brain to think clearly about how to deal with today’s problems, instead of living in tomorrow’s fears.
If you’re feeling especially triggered, stressed, or hyper vigilant, reach out to a therapist trained in trauma. There may be deeper issues that you may need to address to help you heal.
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Hey everyone, I really appreciate you reading my blog! Have a wonderful day. :)
Marianne
If you are struggling to find eating disorder treatment with help with binge eating in San Diego, schedule a free, 15-minute phone consultation using the online scheduler (just click on the orange button), and I will help you get where you need to be!
You can find more information about me on Instagram @drmariannemiller or on my Facebook page.